Growing Down by Lauren Davis
The Ethics of Dodgeball by Ben Jubas
Giri Nathan by Giri Nathan
I Wrote a Thesis by Rafael Abrahams
Religion with Friends by Susannah Sharpless
Growing Up Quaker by Veronica Nicholson
Elegy by Matthew Brailas
The Gay Diaspora by Jared Garland
Schoolyard Diva by Hadley Newton
1000 Words by January Canto
Confessions: on Thesising by Ted Garzimo
Bickering Ivy by Cezanne Simon
Cheat Code Honor by Matt Gibbons
Boston by Marty Page
Overheard seven minutes before a 90-person lecture
Prefrosh, to professor at podium: Professor, I was just wondering, is it alright if I sit in on this lecture?
Overheard at a poetry reading
Matthew Dickman: How many people here like to do drugs? Anyone? No one?
Chang-Rae Lee: *raises hand*
Overheard in Cap
Theta junior: I just don’t really like when they play rap music. I can’t relate to it. It’s not my fault I didn’t start from the bottom.
Overheard on Alexander Beach
Girl, looking at tent for Eisgruber reception: OH! That’s Eisergruber… Iregoober… Eisgoob…
Overheard in Frist
Bro: I tried to use an idiom yesterday, and I totally messed it up.
Overheard on a ListServ
Shere Khan member, on record release party: We’ve been practicing singing, and no one is getting PMC’d this time.
Overheard in Blair
Long Island sophomore male: I didn’t know any black people before I came here.
California sophomore male: Jesus! We had like four of them.
Overheard in GER 102
German instructor: Can you locate Checkpoint Charlie on this map of Berlin?
Student: Is that a restaurant?
Overheard in Wilcox
Male grad student: I’m gonna have a PhD! Get at me boys!
Overheard in ART 242
Engineer: Is drawing different from painting?
Overheard at a press
President-Elect Christopher Eisgruber: One of the best things about being president-designate is that I will no longer have to explain what the job of the provost is.
Overheard in the slums
Theta senior: I swear to God that I did not ctrl-f “dumpster”; I’ll admit that I did Google “dumpster sluts.”
Overheard in the slums
Ivy senior: He’s trying to be a doctor. That’s such a “minority” thing to do.
Overheard in Forbes
Freshman girl: I went to this talk about David Foster Wallace.
Prefrosh, smugly: Oh yeah, he teaches here.
Overheard in Terrace
Ivy junior: I smoked and did some lines and now I don’t know whether to be hyped or chill. I’m like Nietzsche and the Second Dilemma.
Overheard in a Visual Arts student critique
Conceptual sculptor: You seem to struggle with the “stool-ness” of the stool.
Overheard in Holder
Mother, to small child in stroller: It’s not a palace. It’s called a residential college.